


The Bones Are Good

by MaddieandChimney



Series: Multi-Chapter Fics [7]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, M/M, Miscarriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:28:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25444672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaddieandChimney/pseuds/MaddieandChimney
Summary: It's a feeling that she just can't shake, the similarities between Doug and Josh's new boyfriend are all too much but when her husband thinks she's fixating and seeing things that aren't there, Buck steps in to help his friend.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Josh Russo, Josh Russo/OC, Maddie Buckley & Josh Russo, Maddie Buckley/Howie "Chimney" Han
Series: Multi-Chapter Fics [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1815556
Comments: 11
Kudos: 78





	1. Chapter 1

It starts with a feeling.

A feeling she can’t quite explain no matter how hard she tries to. It’s just an uncomfortable tension that starts in her stomach and eventually rises to her chest, her heart aching because she just can’t shake it off. It doesn’t matter how hard she tries to push it aside, how she tries to tell herself that maybe she’s just seeing things and feeling things that simply don’t exist.

It doesn’t matter how hard she tries though, trying to convince herself that maybe the fact the other man is a surgeon is some kind of trigger for her that she hadn’t even realised could exist. Maybe it’s the fact he’s a perfectionist, another thing she knows she struggles with. Maybe it’s the way her best friend has stopped going out as much as he used to but isn’t that normal in a new relationship?

Maddie just can’t stop her mind from throwing a hundred different scenarios and thoughts at her when she looks at him. And she wishes she could agree with the niggling thought in the back of her mind that Josh knows better because really, it doesn’t matter how many pamphlets on domestic violence any person reads, it doesn’t matter how many victims they listen to on the other end of the phone, it doesn’t even matter that he knows someone who has been through it, it’s all so different. There’s no direct path from loving relationship to _that._

“You’re acting weird.” Josh frowns when he settles down on the chair next to her, slipping her a mug of hot coffee as she bites down on her lip. “Do you think it was too soon for you to come back to work?”

Of course he would think it was her problem, everyone seems to jump to the same conclusion these days – that Maddie was grieving and it gives her some sort of get out of jail free card to act however she wants. She can see the sympathy in his eyes, even more so when her hand, on instinct, falls to her stomach before she shakes her head. “I needed to be back in work.”

“I get that, it’s a good distraction.”

Her entire body tenses, her mind whirring once more as she tries to decipher what Josh could possibly need a distraction from. “But you’ve been staring at me for a good ten minutes now, did you want to talk or…?”

“Do you and Steve want to come for dinner tonight?” She blurts out, her own eyes wide at the very thought of the man she loathes with every part of her being in her house, being around her kids. But she needs him to know that Josh has her and it doesn’t matter what, he’ll always have her.

“Oh, uh, I’ll have to check if he has surgery or not, you know how it is.” Maddie can remember all the times she’d pause, make excuses for why she couldn’t attend until her friends all gave up in the end. She’s determined, she’s never going to give up, no matter how many times he rejects her invites.

With a small nod of her head, she forces a smile on her lips, “You can come on your own, Amelia and Henry love spending time with their Uncle Josh.” It’s enough at least for Josh’s shoulders to relax, a smile on his face when he nods his head. It’s a relief to know she hasn’t lost him yet. But it still doesn’t stop her from reaching for his arm, giving it a tight squeeze as she tries to look for any signs of him flinching from her touch. There’s none, he only moves his hand on top of hers and grins at her with a smile that should be enough to alleviate any concerns she has.

It doesn’t.

.

“Why did you invite them over again?” Chimney lets out a sigh, watching as his wife quickly pulls the lasagne Bobby had cooked for them out the fridge, giving it a sniff as she does.

“Do you think this is still okay to eat?”

He only shrugs his shoulders, “I don’t see why not.”

“There’s a tonne of sympathy food in here that we need to get rid of. No offence to Bobby, I know it’s his thing but—” Maddie chews on her bottom lip in contemplation, throwing the dish beneath Chimney’s nose as she frowns, “Does it smell okay?”

“It smells like lasagne, I don’t—can we slow down? I thought we’d have more time, you already rushed back to work, do you really want to entertain tonight?” Chimney knows he’s messed up when she freezes – although, he thinks, he does that a lot these days; says or does the wrong thing. His wife has a sudden short fuse laced with all the guilt and the regret that was intertwined within the grieving process. Only, she wasn’t allowing herself to grieve, not really.

There’s still something about the way she is around Josh’s relatively new boyfriend, the fake laughs and the overly friendly way she touches her best friend. As though she’s protecting him, or making a point, he’s not entirely certain which one. But he knows that after everything that happened four years ago and all the heartbreaks that had followed, she’s more than a little protective of him. He’s just lucky, he supposes, that Hen has Karen and he doesn’t have to go through all this bringing anyone to meet the best friend scenario that he has been through with Maddie and Josh several times.

“I just thought it would be nice.”

“You don’t want to be alone with me.” He’s quick to point out, having thought it not wanting to say it for the past week, the realisation that as every day passed, she was using every excuse (including their children) to just avoid it being the two of them. Both Amelia and Henry had slept in their bed every night for the last week for no particular reason other than Maddie had encouraged them to.

“I thought it would be nice to have people over, so we can finally get through all this damn food.” It’s with that she slams the dish down on the counter, “Just throw it in the oven, they’ll be here soon.”

With a frown, and a roll of his eyes the moment her back is turned, he mutters, “Yes ma’am.”

.

Maddie supposes that, from years of pretending, she’s become an expert in the art of deception. But the years that followed Doug, the past almost five years of being loved by Chimney, becoming a mother and a wife, has made it a little harder. Somehow, she forgets how easy she would find it to fake a smile when they were in public, how she’d resist the urge to flinch away the moment Doug’s arm wrapped around her waist to pull her a little closer to him. It’s easy to forget because all she remembers now is the bad, when at the time, she had been clinging onto the good. So, watching and waiting for some sort of response from her best friend when his boyfriend puts his hand over his or he interrupts him isn’t getting her anywhere because Josh looks nothing more than completely and utterly enamoured with the other man.

Steve reminds her of Doug in every single way possible – he’s charming, handsome, intelligent and he knows all the right things to say. He always comes armed with flowers and a bottle of wine, a few ‘funny’ stories here and there about his day and an arm wrapped lovingly around Josh. He’s also fiery, quick to anger but easy to hide it (Maddie had seen the flash in his eyes and the glare on his face when Chimney had accidentally mentioned one of Josh’s exes in a conversation once). But her husband doesn’t see it, she can tell by the way Chimney shakes his hand and laughs at his jokes that he doesn’t see what she sees or feel how she feels.

“How are you two feeling after everything?” Of course he would be the one to address the elephant in the room, the conversation Maddie had successfully managed to avoid at all costs. Doug liked to do that, throw people off their game, make them feel uncomfortable like it was a game to him. But she’s not going to let Steve win, not this one.

Instead, she plasters on her award-willing smile, although her fingers are desperately clutching at the fabric of her dress beneath the table, digging her nails into her thighs as she does. “We’re fine.” Chimney frowns, eyes alight with concern as he turns from the two men across the table towards her. He opens his mouth as though he wants to correct her, as though he’s going to tell this virtual stranger the truth until Maddie kicks him under the table. It’s no one’s business, he’s not opening up his heart in front of anyone, especially not the man she already loathes so much.

“I guess we’re fine.” There’s a bitterness to his voice, as he talks through gritted teeth and Maddie can see the satisfied smirk on Steve’s face for just a second before it’s gone, replaced by that all too familiar look of pity. His hand moves to Josh’s leg beneath the table and for just a second, Maddie swears she sees the way her colleague and best friend tenses just for a flash of a second.

“So, why don’t you tell us about your day?” Maddie asks, grabbing the glass of wine in front of her and taking a sip because she can feel her husband’s suspicious gaze on her. “Any good surgeries?” The distraction works as she had planned it, his hand moving from Josh’s leg to eagerly tell his story (Doug always liked to talk about himself and how _wonderful_ a surgeon he was, too).

.

“What the hell was that about?” Really, Maddie had known this was coming, she could tell by the way Chimney had gone relatively silent at the dinner table, how his leg had started bouncing the moment she _insisted_ the other couple stay that little bit longer and watch a movie together. How he had mistook her desperate need to get them to stay longer so Steve knew Josh had a solid support system behind him and a friend in her who would never give up, for her trying to avoid him (maybe it had been a little of that, too).

She had known he was gunning for a fight the moment they were alone, but she at least tries to act a little surprised as she shrugs her shoulders, “I don’t know what you mean, Howard.”

“You’re acting weird.”

“Why does everyone keep saying that?”

Throwing his hands in the air, Chimney lets out a groan, “Because you are! You’ve been acting like this for weeks, even before—” Maddie cuts him off, only with the sound of the bedroom door slamming behind her, suddenly uncaring if it wakes either of their children (at least that way she doesn’t have to wake them up herself to get them to sleep between her and her husband).

She should know better than to expect him to at least give her five minutes to calm down, the sound of the door opening behind her, before it suddenly closes again, “Something is going on with you.”

“Yeah, we’re grieving, remember? Everyone else sure does.” It’s enough to make him pause, at least, a look of contemplation on his face before he slowly shakes his head.

“No-I mean yes, but… do you have a problem with Steve?” He asks the question as though it’s been building up inside of him for a long time, his chest deflating the moment he does, his eyes searching hers for some kind of clue and Maddie supposes, it’s now or never.

“He’s hurting Josh.”

There’s a look of confusion on his face, pondering as though he’s trying to fit the same pieces together that Maddie had of an entirely different puzzle. He doesn’t get it, he doesn’t see the same things she does – he just expects Josh to turn up with a make-up covered black eye or to be constantly sobbing, flinching from every touch. Then maybe he’d believe her. “Has Josh told you that?”

Maddie had been expecting anything other than the pure pity she hears in his voice right then, his eyes softening when he steps towards her, “Well, no… but…”

“I know there’s some similarities but there’s a lot of differences too.”

“You don’t understand, I _know_. I just… I just know, okay? You don’t—you didn’t go through what I did, you don’t see it in the same way. He’s good at masking it, Doug was the same but I can see him.” Even she recognises how crazy she sounds right then, her eyes wide, her hands flying all over the place. Her husband of one year, the father of their two children, is looking at her as though he doesn’t know who she is.

There’s a silence for a few moments as he scratches the back of his neck and shifts awkwardly from one foot to the other. He doesn’t know what to say, her breathing heavy and her cheeks red, eyes completely on him as she waits, “He’s not Doug.”

“You don’t believe me.”

“You can’t just go throwing around accusations like that with no proof, Maddie! You’ll lose Josh! You’re not thinking straight right now and that’s understandable, I get that but Steve is not Doug and Josh is not you.” The desperation in his voice is almost enough for her to relent, her shoulders tense and her glare set on him but instead, she walks towards the door.

“I’ll get proof, you should trust me enough but I’ll get proof.” 

“Where are you going?”

“To get the kids.” Maddie is taken aback by the speed at which he moves towards her, his hand slamming down on the door before she can open it. It’s not often she’s seen him angry and even less so that she has been the reason for that anger but there she was, defiantly staring at him, waiting for him to drop his hand.

He doesn’t and neither does she, hand still turned around the door handle before he takes a deep breath, “They’re sleeping. Just get into bed, Maddie, I’m not going to try and touch you or talk to you if that’s what you’re trying to avoid. Just get into bed.” She is stubborn to a fault at times, her eyes fixated on his, knowing that when he wants to be, he can be the exact same way. “Now!”

Maddie also knows when she’s pushed him too far, her hand dropping from the door before his does, as she backs away, “I am right about him.”

“You’re fixating so you don’t have to deal with the fact we lost our baby.” It’s said so matter of fact, his voice monotone, edging on angry but his face tells a different story, tears welling up in his eyes, the frown lines and wrinkles more prominent than usual. He looks as though he’s aged about ten years since they got home from the hospital a week before.

“I know I’m right, I just _know_ I am.” She’s not going to open up that book, as a part of her wonders if he’s right but no, she knew before. She saw all the signs before – the way he always has to be near him, how Josh is no longer allowed out for drinks after work, the way he’s constantly checking his phone and not with the usual smile of someone who’s happy to hear from another person but with nerves, instead. Even if he hasn’t hit him yet, Maddie just knows something is wrong. After all, it took Doug four years before he laid a hand on her, so there’s still hope.

With a sigh, a slump of his shoulders in sheer exhaustion, Chimney only shakes his head, “If you say so, Maddie. If you say so.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of implied domestic (emotional) violence. 
> 
> Mostly focused on Josh & Buck but also has brief mention of a miscarriage.

Chimney takes a deep breath as he looks at his brother-in-law knowing that his wife isn’t going to forgive him easily for the betrayal. “I just think she needs help and she’s not listening to me.” He finally says, approaching the subject as carefully as he possibly can.

Buck doesn’t say anything for a few minutes, a distant look in his eyes before he nods his head, “What makes you think Maddie is wrong? I know she’s going through some… stuff at the moment but her instincts—my sister isn’t usually completely off point, you know?” The sudden regret in telling him pulsates through his body as he shakes his head, he had wanted someone who would be on _his_ side, who would discourage her from pursuing this new obsession. Instead, Chimney feels as though he’s told the one person who would quite happily stand by the other woman’s side and set fire to a building _with_ her. It was a bad choice telling Buck.

He’s been worried more than once about the woman he loves, but this… this was different. She was fixated on Steve, to the point she had been up all night trawling through his Facebook page as though something would scream out at her that she was right. He had heard her on the phone to Athena asking for a background check and he knows that if Josh finds out, he won’t be so easy to forgive and forget, especially if she’s wrong. There’s still that niggling part of him that fears that she’s right, that this man they have invited into their home is hurting someone Maddie loves very much. He loves Josh, he really does but he’s terrified what trouble his wife will get herself into whether it’s the truth or not.

“It doesn’t matter if she’s right, I’m more scared that she is because she won’t give it up. It’s all she thinks about and I know it’s an avoidance thing and I know Josh is her best friend—”

“He is her best friend and she won’t let him go through the same hell she did.” Chimney has grown used to one Buckley snapping at him constantly, but now he can see the glare in Buck’s eyes and the way his arms are defensively folded and he’s not sure he can take the constant sniping from the two of them.

It’s with that he takes a step back and shrugs his shoulders, “What if she’s wrong?”

“What if she’s not?”

The question is fair and one Chimney wishes he could answer but instead, he’s literally saved by the bell that sounds out across the station.

.

Buck doesn’t talk to him for the rest of the day, and Chimney knows he’s in trouble when he walks through the door and neither children are running towards him. That can only mean Maddie has taken them somewhere to get away from the screaming match that’s about to ensue. It takes everything in him not to walk back out of the door, only driven forward by the fact he knows he has to face the music.

“Maddie.”

“You tattled to my brother?” And of course, her brother tattled right back and he should have known better, he should have expected it. Buck and Maddie’s relationship was like no other sibling bond he had ever seen before, the two of them stuck by each other even when the other was clearly in the wrong. Which Maddie was, he’s entirely certain of that because even if she’s _right_ , what does she plan on doing about it?

He carefully sets his bag down on the counter, before he nods his head, “I was asking for advice.” He finally settles on, wishing he could somehow bridge the gap that had formed between them. It’s the first time in their relationship he’s ever felt as though he can’t do it anymore, even though he knows he’ll never walk out. “I needed to talk to someone and I thought Buck would be able to make you see sense.”

Definitely not the right thing to say, her cheeks reddening and he can see the way she’s digging her nails harshly into her arm as she keeps her arms folded and tight against her chest. Can’t she see how worried he is about her? _For_ her? But she doesn’t scream at him, she only takes a deep breath as though to calm herself until she moves towards him, turning her laptop to face him and sliding a folder his way.

“I’m perfectly fine but my best friend isn’t. Or he isn’t going to be. I don’t know how far it’s gotten yet and don’t look at me like that Howard.” He bites down on his lip, trying to stop the anger from rising when she talks, “Just look, please. You’re my husband, you’re meant to be on my side no matter what, right? You promised me that you would love me no matter what and that means trusting me, too. Please just look.”

It’s only the desperation in her voice that makes him open the folder in front of him, frowning when he sees Steve’s mug shot looking back at him. Athena had come through, possibly putting her own job on the line for doing so but as ever, uncaring because Maddie would pull the odd favour for her too when necessary. “Domestic battery.” Maddie points at the words, before she flips the page, “Stalking.” And flips the page again, “Aggravated trespassing. All dropped, not enough evidence to bring to court and the victim or victims pulled out and—please say you believe me now? You wanted proof, I have it right here.”

Maddie has that crazed look about her, her eyes wide and her hands shaking with the intensity of which she’s trying to convince her husband. Her hair is a mess, she’s still in the same clothes she had been when he left the house that morning and all he can imagine is her sitting there all day trying to find as much evidence as she can. But to do what with? Slowly, his eyes move towards the laptop, pulling it a little closer to him as he sighs. “You’ve been talking to one of his exes? Maddie, if all of this is true—”

“Josh would do the same for me if our lives had been different.”

Chimney knows that the two are firm best friends, their kids call him Uncle Josh, he had even spent the last two Christmases with Maddie and the kids whilst Chimney worked. But the thought of Maddie putting herself in any danger for anyone, especially after everything she had already gone through, terrifies him in a way he can’t articulate. “I just need to get Josh alone, and not in work because confronting him in his safe place isn’t going to go down well. I can help him, I can fix this.”

She must notice the way he flinches, his hand flying to hers as he shakes his head, “You got away Maddie.”

“And Doug died for it. You almost died for it.” Years had passed and he can still see the tears in her eyes when she mentions it before she frowns.

“Even if you convince Josh to leave him… he won’t be safe.”

“What’s the alternative? He stays until he’s dead or Steve is dead? I don’t—I don’t know what else to do. Tell me what to do.”

He knows she’s right, his shoulders slumping before he pulls her into him and feels her actually relax into his touch for the first time since they had lost their baby. “Okay.” He finally whispers, moving to press his lips to the top of her head before her arms wrap around his waist and she pulls him as close as she possibly can. He hates how relieved he is when he feels her body shaking beneath his touch, the sobs she had been holding back for the past week finally releasing. Her fingers curl tightly around his shirt, her nails digging slightly into his back as he runs his own fingers through long hair, “You’re okay. _We’re_ okay.”

.

Josh stares at his reflection, hands moving slowly to the finger shaped bruise around the top of his arm before he shakes his head. At forty-five years old, he had never felt stupider than he did right then. He had spoken to victims on the phone before, his best friend was a survivor, he had seen the pamphlets and sat through training courses and talks about how to help, what to say or what to do.

Love hadn’t come easily to him, he’d been in and out of relationships his entire adult life. The only permanent feature in his life had been his job and Maddie. The one person who had stood by his side no matter what, who had tried to set him up countless times or who had dragged Chimney to ‘date night’, so she could sit a few tables away from Josh whilst he met someone online and wanted to feel safe.

He hadn’t met Steve online, he’d met him on the day his estranged father had died. Sitting in the hospital cafeteria, clutching onto a mug of coffee as he tried to decipher how he felt only to be disturbed by a handsome, tall stranger in scrubs. It felt as though it was fate and he had fallen hard and fast. The red flags had been there from the beginning – the jealousy, the constant need to hold him close in public, the fact he didn’t pass the best friend test although Maddie would never voice that aloud, not when she saw how happy he was.

Josh hates it, but he _deserves_ to be loved and to be happy. He couldn’t just third-wheel his best friend and her husband for the rest of his life. And when it was good, it was so good – expensive dinners, flowers, little gifts here and there, weekends away. But was all that really worth the anger and the jealousy? Maddie had been so open and honest about her own experience with him and he can see the similarities himself. How Doug had wined and dined a nineteen year old Maddie from the beginning, how special he had made her feel, how quickly they had moved.

But he was forty-five years old and the shame is enough to keep him from running to her and telling her that he’s worried he’s going down the same path she had all those years ago.

.

Josh is surprised when it’s Buck who turns up at his apartment one day, two coffees and a bag of muffins in his hands alongside a concerned look on his face. The youngest Buckley looks him up and down, as though trying to evaluate something, in the exact same way Maddie looks at him these days. Does she know? And if she does, has she told her brother?

It’s not the same, he thinks, although he can see that one day, it might be the same. It’s harsh words, constantly putting him down and making him doubt himself in a way he never has before. The tight grip of his hands around his arms sometimes. He’s never _hit_ him, but Josh knows deep down that it doesn’t mean anything. Maddie had once told him that Doug hadn’t laid a hand on her in that way for four years and he had heard similar stories before. It just makes him feel as though he’s constantly on edge, waiting for the day it happens.

“What are you doing here?”

“Look, I’m not—Maddie says I have no tact, well, everyone does. So, I’m just going to say it because I had this opportunity with my sister so many times and I never did because I thought it was none of my business. And maybe it isn’t, maybe I’m wrong or Maddie is wrong and maybe you’re absolutely fine and you’re happy and in love which—if you are, is great. But if you’re not fine, I need you to know that I’m here.” The words fly from the other man’s mouth, awkwardly resting the food on the counter before he turns to thrust the coffee cup in front of him, wish Josh gratefully takes.

Buck takes a breath as he continues, “You were there for me when I told everyone that I’m bisexual and I know that’s not the same thing as what I think is going on here but you were there for me when I needed you the most. So, do you need me, Josh?”

It’s the question that causes the tears to spill over, his grip tightening on the paper cup as he feels his heart practically dropping to his stomach before he slowly nods his head, “I think I need help.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains mentions of violence - nothing too horrifically graphic but worth the mention!

Josh awkwardly looks around Buck’s apartment, never having been there just the two of them before, “You really don’t have to do this.” He’s nervous, as though he hasn’t repeated those words to the other man several times since Buck had suggested it. It’s harder to accept the help because he doesn’t know what he’s running from – a few harsh words and an over-protective boyfriend? Is there really any reason to hide out?

He gulps down those thoughts because no matter how hard he tries, he can’t forget that impending sense of doom he feels in the pit of his stomach. The same one Maddie had described to him the moment she had decided to leave Doug, that returned when she had signed those divorce papers knowing he’d be able to find her off the back of them. He hates himself for getting himself in the situation after everything she had told him. She was his best friend and he’d always had a thousand questions, ones that she’d always be open and honest about answering his questions and yet, he’d still not seen it coming.

“I want to do this.” Buck shrugs his shoulders as though it’s no big deal, even if Josh can’t help but feel as though he’s put in danger just by being there. It doesn’t make sense, he reasons with himself, Steve has never risen a hand to him, yet it’s all he can think about right then.

There are a few moments of silence before he takes a deep breath, “Do you think Maddie will forgive me?” The question had been playing on his mind since her brother had turned up at his door, biting down on his lip when he looks at the other man desperately. There’s a flash of confusion on his face before the realisation hits and he nods his head all too eagerly.

“What? No-yes, there’s nothing to forgive you for, Josh? Shit, me turning up instead of her has nothing to do with how Maddie feels about you. It’s safer for you here, I’ve never even met the guy but my sister loves you, she doesn’t blame you.” He wants to believe it, he really does but he can’t shake the feeling that Maddie must feel, on some level, disappointed in him. Not nearly as much as he feels about himself though.

There’s an awkward silence once more as Buck looks down at his phone with a frown on his face, before he shakes his head, “You take the bed, I’ve got the couch. Just make yourself at home, I’ll speak to Bobby and switch my shifts around a little so I can drive you to and from work.” It’s the way he sets his phone to the side, his demeanour changing as a flash of anger crosses his face and his fingers tighten around the edge of the kitchen counter. Josh isn’t sure he wants to know what the other man just read, but he dares himself to ask anyway, gulping down the lump in his throat before he does.

“Was that Maddie?”

“Chimney.” Buck sighs, “Maddie found out some stuff, some charges that were ultimately dropped—Chimney thinks we need to speak to Athena, is that okay with you?”

Josh thinks about it for a second, not entirely certain what he would even tell the woman but still, nods his head anyway. Perhaps his unwillingness to stay silent will be the one thing that sets him apart from any exes that Maddie may have discovered. “Just not today, please? I just—I need to sleep and sort of my head out, is that okay?”

“I’m happy to go at your pace.” The youngest Buckley confirms, a grin on his face when he moves to rest his hand on top of Josh’s. “I’ve got your back, we all do.”

.

Maddie can’t remember the last time she really, truly slept, confused when she remembers crying herself to sleep in her husband’s arms only to wake up alone, the sound of their children echoing through the house. Slowly, she sits up, rubbing her eyes, her mouth dry and her head heavy before she reaches for her phone, scrunching up her nose when she realises she’s slept for over twenty-four hours. She can’t help the way her cheeks flush in embarrassment, her head tilting up when the bedroom door opens, “You’re awake.”

“I’m sorry.” She immediately blurts out, watching as he moves towards her, a glass of water and ibuprofen in his hands as he does as though he knew exactly what she’d need the moment her eyes finally opened.

He’s quick to shake his head, “Nothing to be sorry for, I know you’ve barely slept in a while. This was definitely needed.” It’s easy to find herself leaning against him the moment he’s next to her, letting him pop both pills in her open mouth before he brings the glass to her lips and she gratefully swallows. She can hear Amelia and Henry laughing loudly from the slight crack Chimney has left the door open, about to ask the question when Chimney answers without her even needing to say the words out loud. “The kids are fine, told them mommy had a headache and they’ve been on their best behaviour. They’re just finishing up Despicable Me and then I’ll put them to bed.”

She takes another gulp of the water the moment he offers the glass against her lips once more before she rests her head on his shoulder and wraps both arms around his waist. “Josh is okay, too. He’s with your brother.” He feels the way she tenses, his hand running up and down her back as her grip on him tightens. “It’s okay, he’s never met Buck, he doesn’t know where he lives and Josh has promised he’s going to talk to Athena tomorrow. He knows he needs help, Maddie, you did good.”

“I-I did good?”

“So good, I’m sorry I didn’t believe you but it’s going to be okay. You did the right thing.”

.

The moment the kids are in bed, Maddie sends Josh a quick text just to let him know that she loves him, quickly sending the same to her brother alongside a ‘thank you’, trying to push down how worried she is for the two of them. Her ears perk up the moment the door knocks, “I’ll get it!” Her stomach growling as a reminder that she was absolutely starving, grateful for the speedy delivery of their local Chinese restaurant.

It takes everything within her not to slam the door shut the moment she opens it and her eyes settle on the all-too-familiar man on the other side. Her grip tightens on the door, shutting it ever-so-slightly so he doesn’t take any opportunity to walk inside. His voice is kind, despite the anger in his eyes that she can tell he’s struggling to dampen, his own fists clenched at his side, “Hey, Maddie… I’m sorry to just pop by, is Josh here? He’s not answering his phone or in his apartment, I’m worried about him.”

For just a second, Maddie can remember all the times she had gone running to her friends, only for them to open the door to Doug the moment he turned up and put on his charm. She’d always been a drama queen, they’d joke, and it would feel like a stab in the heart every single time as she played along and ran back into his arms. She’d quickly learned that running wasn’t getting her anywhere, it was easier to pretend. She takes a deep breath, forcing a smile on her lips, “He’s not, sorry. We were off shift today, maybe he went out with friends?”

Steve checks his phone once more, and Maddie can feel the way her heart is thumping uncomfortably against her chest, her grip tightening on the door in an attempt to stop herself from visibly trembling. “Yeah, maybe – we had a little argument and I just really need to apologise, do you think you can try and phone him for me? He might pick up for you. I can wait.” The way he say sit leaves no room for argument, but Maddie shakes her head anyway, feeling increasingly uncomfortable by the second.

“Maybe give him some space, we all need space sometimes.”

“Maddie? Who’s at the door?” Her husband doesn’t give her a chance to answer as he moves behind her, eyes settling on the man who had been a guest in their home far too many times for his liking. “Steve, hi. Maddie, the kids are asking for you.” It takes her a second to see through the lie, knowing they’d put the kids to bed together barely an hour before, his arm easily sliding around her waist before he pulls her back behind him so he can take her position at the front door. “We should go, it’s bedtime for the kids and—yeah.” His poker-face has never been good and she can feel his struggle with coming up with an excuse, one hand on the door to keep it closed and the other tightly gripped around the material of her top to keep her in place behind him.

“He’s here, isn’t he? There’s nowhere else he’d go.” Maddie can hear that anger he’s been trying to hold back before the sound of a hand slamming down on their door seems to reverberate through her and Chimney is forced to stumble back against her. It takes both of them a moment to register the sound of the door slamming closed, before the screaming of her best friends name begins sounding through the otherwise empty house.

Any fear Maddie had once felt is gone the moment his foot makes contact with the bottom stair, practically shoving her husband out of the way so she can slip herself in front of Steve, cheeks flushing red in anger. “We have kids, get out.” There’s a fierce level of protectiveness she feels inside of her, her glare settling on the man despite how she feels as though she’s going to throw up right then.

There’s a moment of silent between the two adults, their eyes fixated on each other as though waiting for the other to back down before Chimney easily slides himself between the two, “Josh isn’t here, so you need to leave.”

Maddie sees the fist flying towards her husband, suddenly torn between him and then the sound of their daughter crying for her parents. Her eyes dart towards the top of the stairs, her heart breaking the moment she sees her three-year-old daughter sobbing, clutching at her teddy bear as her bottom lip trembles. “Hey, baby, remember what mommy and daddy said when you’re scared and mommy and daddy can’t help you? Who do you call?” There’s relief when the little girl runs off towards her parents bedroom where Maddie knows she’s left her phone.

She longs to run after her but turns instead to the sight of her husband laying on the floor and Steve standing over him. It’s for a second, but her heart clenches when his face flashes with the all too familiar face of Doug, the same look of pure hatred and anger, mixed with desperation on his face as she tries to calm her shaking body. “You have about five minutes before the police turn up, so if you leave now—”

“I’m not leaving without him.”

“He’s not here.” She’s quick to get out, watching as Chimney slowly moves to stand up with a hand on his face. “You know him, right? Do you really think he’d stay hidden when you just hit his friend? You know him better than that.”

The acceptance that she’s telling the truth only lasts a second, his hands quickly wrapping around her husband’s throat as he slams him against the nearest wall. It takes every ounce of strength within the woman not to scream, the reminder that their kids are upstairs already sobbing tearing through her as she practically runs towards the two men. “Tell me where he is!” The words keep repeating over and over again, his grip tightening as Chimney’s hands scramble at the arms, nails scratching the skin there to no avail despite the blood she can see starting to form.

He can’t breathe, Chimney can’t breathe, the thought keeps reiterating in her mind, the panic rising as she scrambles for what to do or what to say. “He’s left you.” She finally gets out, the grip on her husband faltering, “He knows what you are, I told him everything. I got the police reports, I’ve spoken to Louis _and_ Charlie, I told him exactly what you are and he made the decision before you can try and destroy him and I’ll make it my personal mission to make sure you never find him.” It’s enough, for his hands to drop from Chimney’s throat and to turn to her, his eyes darkening, a smirk on his face.

“I’d never hit a woman, but for you, I’d make an exception.”

Maddie can’t help the scoff that falls from her lips, holding her head up high, her stare fixated on him when she tries not to focus too much on the relief at the fact that the man she loves can breathe again. “Because you’re such a big man.” She manages to get out, the slight tremor in her voice giving her away the moment his hand rises and her eyes close, bracing herself for impact.

It never comes.

Her eyes snap open in confusion, met with the sight of her husband shaking his hand as he clenches and unclenches his fist, a pained look on his face as Doug-no, she reminds herself, _not_ Doug, Steve lies on the floor. The sound of sirens can be heard in the background, Maddie’s eyes wide as she looks from the semi-conscious man, to Chimney and finally, towards the stairs. “I love you.” She finally settles on, knowing there’s only one right choice in that second, her husband can wait to be held.

“I love you, too.” He calls after her as she runs up the stairs, forcing the biggest, fakest grin she can possibly muster in that second when she walks into Henry’s bedroom and takes him from his crib, Amelia jumping up from her place on the floor as she drops the phone and wraps her arms around her mother’s legs.

“You’re so clever, ‘Melia. Mommy and daddy are so, so proud of you.” She lifts her up to rest on the opposite hip from her brother, looking at the two of them before she presses a kiss to each of their heads. “Steve was just playing a silly game, it’s okay to be scared but the police are going to take him away because you were both the bravest.”

“Called 911, just like you told me.” Amelia answers, wiping at the tears on her face by rubbing her face against Maddie’s shoulder, sniffing, “Did good?”

“You did so good, and Henry did too!” It’s not hard to pretend as though everything is okay, to put the pep in her voice that she doesn’t feel deep inside of her because she knows they need her to force the happiness a lot more than she needs to break down right then.

“Aunt Sue promised it would be okay.” The sad voice of her daughter whispers, resting her head in the crook of her mother’s neck as Henry does the same, both their little hands clenching around her top as she holds them both tightly and as close as she possibly can. She can only imagine the questions Sue would have for her, knowing she would have been flagged down the moment they realised who was calling.

“And when is Aunt Sue ever wrong?” Maddie whispers, hiding her face in her daughter’s long, black hair as she closes her eyes.

“Never, ever.”

“That’s right, baby girl, never, ever. It’s all okay. Mommy’s okay, daddy’s okay.”

“Steve’s okay?” The innocent voice of her unknowing daughter asks, eyes big when she pulls back to look at her mother as Maddie nods her head.

“We won’t be seeing him ever again… he’s going to be in lots and lots of trouble with the police, and Aunt Athena but he’s okay. Everyone is okay.”

Amelia sniffs, Henry whining when he presses himself a little more into his mother, gripping onto her tightly, “Didn’t like him.”

“Me neither but he’s gone now and—” She’s cut off by the sound of the door opening, her exhausted looking husband walking through the door but still, forcing that smile on his face as she had done. She smiles gratefully when he takes Henry from her arms, giving her the chance to adjust their small daughter, cradling her as she did when she was a baby.

The little girls big, brown eyes look over at her daddy, both of them smiling at each other and Maddie is relieved she can’t make out the bruising of his cheek in the darkness of the room just yet. The woman leans into her husband’s touch the moment his hand is on her cheek before his lips are against her forehead and she finds herself genuinely smiling at him. “You’re okay?”

Chimney’s smile grows, rocking their son against him as he pats his back, repeating their usual mantra with an all too familiar glint in his eyes, “We’re okay.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Non graphic discussions around domestic violence. 
> 
> Mentions of a miscarriage, again, non-graphic but is discussed.

From the moment Buck had told him that his (ex) boyfriend had gone to Maddie and Chimney’s house the evening before, Josh couldn’t shake that guilt that settled in his stomach and seemed to flow through his entire body until he felt as though he couldn’t breathe. He is filled with so much regret as he thinks about all the things he could have differently – he could have not stayed in the hospital and just gone home and mourned alone which would have meant Steve wouldn’t have had the chance to approach him. He could have left him the first time he told him to say no to going out with his friends (past boyfriends had always asked to join or at least _asked_ if they had something planned). He could have never introduced the man to Maddie and Chimney, brought him to their home where they had two kids who have so easily gotten hurt.

He feels sick at that thought, Maddie had already been through enough trauma of her own and now, all he feels is that he’s added to the already crushing load. “Maddie insists that they’re fine.” Buck finally pulls him from his thoughts, and Josh had barely noticed he was clutching onto the hot mug of coffee so hard, his palms have turned a bright shade of red. “She’s asked if we can go around, would you be okay with that?”

“Is she okay with that?” He had brought danger to her doorstep, literally. And Josh isn’t stupid, he knows that hindsight is a wonderful thing and what felt like aggressive jealousy _now_ had felt almost nice at the time. No one had ever wanted to be with him so much that they wanted him all to themselves. What now felt like overbearing had felt just nicely over-protective when he was in the midst of it all.

Her brother sighs, resting a hand on his shoulder, “She insisted on it and I think it’s a good idea. Maddie understands what’s going on in your head better than anyone, and I want to help but I don’t know how. But we don’t have to go anywhere if you don’t want to go.”

It’s easier than it should be to force a smile on his face in an attempt to comfort Buck, knowing he’s done more than enough for him since he turned up at his apartment the day before. “You’re helping enough, seriously—you’ve been amazing. If he acted like that with my friends, I don’t know what he would have done if he’d found me.” He shudders at the thought – he’d been through the pain of being beaten years before, the humiliation that came alongside it.

There’s a momentary pause, eyes finally meeting Buck’s as he takes a deep, shuddering breath, almost dreading the answer, “I-is it bad? Did he hurt them? Did he—did he hurt Maddie? The kids?”

“From what my sister told me, he turned up shouting the odds, demanding to know where you were. Obviously they refused and he hit Chimney and when he went to turn on Maddie, Chimney got one hell of a punch in. Maddie sounded more than a little impressed, so, on the bright side—if there is such thing as a bright side in all this—it seems as though those two are getting along again?” 

It at least feels as though he can breathe again as he nods his head, not able to stop the guilt though, Chimney had been hurt because of him. Because of a series of decisions he had made that led that man to their door that night and he hates himself for it. He’s not sure he’ll ever be able to _not_ blame himself. “W-we should go… I at least… I should thank them at least. I need to see them.”

.

The minute Buck runs into their house on the aptly named ‘morning after the night before’, he throws his arms around his sister, pulling her as close to him as he can possibly manage. “I’m okay.” Maddie manages to get out, not missing the way Josh is hovering in the doorway as though he’s not welcome. “It’s Chimney’s face that isn’t.”

Finally, Buck pulls back just enough to look at his brother-in-law, before his eyes move back to his sister. She watches as his gaze lingers on her face as though he’s trying to evaluate whether she’s telling the truth before he takes a deep breath, “He didn’t hurt you?”

“He didn’t get to, my amazing husband lands quite the punch when he wants to.” Buck still flinches even when she tries to smile at him, an arm moving instead to wrap around Chimney’s waist as he stands next to her, pulling him close. “Hey, on the bright side, at least we have actual charges to file now.”

Her words are aimed at her best friend that time, peaking over her brother’s shoulder as she smirks and reaches out a hand for him, “Come here.” She hates how he hesitates, his face pale and the guilt clear in his eyes before his shoulders slump and he heads towards the other three. “I know that look, I’ve _felt_ that look and you can forget it.” She doesn’t want to let go of her husband, having pretty much clung to his side from the moment the police left but she drops her arm from him to close the gap between her and Josh.

“This wasn’t on you.” She whispers, taking his face in her hands, affectionally brushing her thumb to his cheeks to wipe the fallen tears away before she smiles. “I’m so proud of you.”

There’s a scoff and a frown, “Proud? I-I… nothing happened to me, Maddie. He didn’t—I didn’t go through half what you did.”

“You got out. It doesn’t matter what you got out from or how bad it was or how bad it could have been compared to what someone else went through. You asked for help.” Maddie tries not to think about how she had tried to do the same several times, only to never be believed, not when Doug was just so charming. Too much has happened over the last few days to still cling to the anger she can feel trying to burn inside of her at the thought of how Chimney hadn’t believed her either, not at first. Steve’s charm had fooled him and it was the first time Maddie realised how it felt to be on the outside looking in, second guessing everything.

“I’m so sorry, I-I didn’t know he would come here, I didn’t want anyone else to get hurt.” The tears fall heavier as he shakes his head and Maddie drops her hands from his cheeks. “I don’t… how can you forgive me? He came here, he could have hurt you, he—look what he did to Chimney.”

“Oh please, my husband stabbed him and now we’re married with two kids. I wouldn’t worry about him not forgiving you.”

There’s a pause, silence between the four adults before Chimney is the first to let out a small laugh as her brother rolls his eyes and Josh just stares at her in shock. “We’re fine, the kids are fine and that asshole is right where he belongs with a whole bunch of charges I didn’t even know existed thanks to Athena. You’re going to get closure, I promise.”

“But closure to what?” Josh finally whispers, desperately looking at her as his bottom lip trembles and she knows he’s about to burst into harsher, more intense sobs. “He didn’t _do_ anything. I just—I let him tell me what to do and who to see and god, I was about to move in with him Maddie and I’ve only been dating him for three months. I was going to give up everything because I thought-I thought he loved me and I loved him.”

Maddie tilts her head to look back at her husband, wary of saying anything that could hurt him because Doug was still a sore topic between the two. He supported her through the trauma, there were still some difficult days or something or someone would trigger that trauma that was still a part of her. But still, he loved her more than anyone has ever loved her in her entire life and it hurts him to know that someone hurt her in unimaginable ways. “I moved in with Doug eight weeks after I met him, he proposed to me four weeks later. The only reason we delayed the wedding was because I was in college and it was unspoken in so many words but—that was something he let me have. I was the one going to college and training to be a nurse but he _let_ me and he made it clear that he could take it away at any second.”

She takes a breath, “I tried to break up with him five times between the time we started dating and the first time he hit me. And every single time there was someone there to push me back into his arms and remind me how lucky I was to have him. How I’d never find a love like his again… my best friend at the time even told me that his jealousy was a good thing because it was just another way of showing me he loved me. He didn’t hit me until we were married but he spent years destroying me until he knew I wouldn’t leave. So I’m going to tell you what I wish just one person would have told me, okay?”

He nods his head, the tears finally stopping, both her hands moving to his, “It is not okay, the way he loves you is not right and it’s not fair and you are not lucky. You will be great without him, you do not need to be loved like that and one day—” Maddie smiles as she thinks about the one true love of her life, taking a deep breath, “You’ll find someone who does make you feel lucky because you deserve that, Josh.”

Her grin widens despite the tears falling down her own cheeks when Josh at least gives her a trace of smile before he nods his head at the two men standing behind her, “You made your husband and your brother cry.” He show-whispers, causing her to turn around to see two of her favourite men unashamedly wiping their cheeks.

“Ah well, we can all have a good cry together.”

.

Chimney shuts the door to their kitchen to drown out the noise of their (three) two kids messing around with their Uncle Buck in the living room as Josh watches on. It’s good, he thinks, to see the man smiling again, even if it barely reaches his eyes. He can see the overwhelming sadness in them every time he looks over and sees his forming black eye, he can sense the guilt that just doesn’t go away overnight.

“Are you feeling okay?” He finally asks – it’s been a long day, full of being interviewed by the police, trying to explain everything to the kids amid the increasing concern over the yellowing of the side of daddy’s face and the bruising that was also forming around his neck. Both Buck and Josh hadn’t left, keeping an eye on the kids for them as they went to make their statements and as the evening was coming to a close, it didn’t look as though either men were all too willing to leave.

Maddie shoots a smile at him as she puts down the plate she had been holding, contemplating the question for only a second, “I think so? It sounds weird because I know last night and today has been _a lot_ for all of us but I feel better than I have done since—since we lost the baby.” Maddie bites down on her lip, feeling awful for saying it out loud but quickly shrugging it off, “I was angry… at the world and at you. Mostly at you because that was easier even though what happened just… it happened. We have two beautiful children and I’d love a third, but I’m not getting any younger and we already have so much good and so much love in this house, another baby would add to that of course but—not having another baby doesn’t take anything away from what we already have.”

He thinks back to holding her hand in the hospital, just a few days away from their twelve-week scan when she had started spotting and cramping in a way she hadn’t with the other two pregnancies. How she wouldn’t even look him in the eyes in the days after, how every chance she got she would snap at him or she’d just refuse to be alone with him. It had hurt but it was barely a week from the happiest four plus years of their lives together. “I’m glad you’re not angry anymore.”

“Me too. I just need to ask one thing, okay?” Chimney nods, “You’ve never not trusted me before, you’ve never… questioned my intentions or my instincts, you’ve never… I’ve never had to try and convince you to be on my side or provide you with evidence to prove you need to stand next to me. Don’t make me do that again, okay? Because if you’re not on my side always, even when I’m not being my best at that time, then I feel lost. I need my husband to be on my side even if I do turn out be completely off the mark.”

It’s reasonable, she’s stood by him even when she thinks he’s making stupid decisions like turning down the role of temporary Captain when Bobby was out after surgery last year or when she had held his hand during the worlds most awkward dinner with his father even when she absolutely didn’t want to go. So, he nods his head, “I promise.”

It seems to be enough for his wife as she moves towards him, fingers grazing along the bruise before she takes his hand and presses her lips against the bruised knuckles, “It’s totally wrong how I’m a little turned on by this look, right?”

There’s a teasing glint in his eyes that causes him to laugh, quickly moving to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear as he nods, “A little wrong but I’ll take it. I’d burn the world down to protect you and the kids, you know that.”

“I do and that is _very_ hot. I love you… I love you so, so much.”

“I love you too, Madeline Buckley-Han.”

Her arms move around his shoulders, her smile lessening before she scrunches her nose up, “Do you think Josh can get closure? The kind of closure that doesn’t end in a funeral and… when I ran from Doug, I didn’t know it would end the way it did and I don’t want Josh to feel that way.”

There’s no easy answer, Maddie had to kill her husband to finally get away from him and clearly Steve was involved in a cycle that meant that even if he were found guilty in court of assaulting him and did get sentenced, Chimney had no doubt he’d be out in no time with another victim they couldn’t protect. “I don’t know.” He answers honestly, brushing his lips against her nose before he lets out a sigh, “I don’t know how this ends but I know we’ve got Josh and your brother definitely has his back.”

She seems to ponder on it for a second, before she’s pulling away from him, “I really do love you, even when I don’t act like it. I spent years with a man who tried to make me feel as though I was lucky to be loved by him… that it was a privilege when it was the furthest thing from it, only to find someone who actually fills me with so much joy that—it’s not forced. I just feel _lucky_ , so lucky to have you and to love you and to be loved by you.”

“I know that feeling.” He grins, pulling her back towards him quickly, until her chest slams against his as she giggles, only dampened when he captures her lips with his.


End file.
